Today it has been announced that the European Union will regulate the use of the term “big data”.
“Volumes of misuse of the term big data has gone way over what is acceptable” says an EU spokesperson. Therefore the Commission will initiate a snap roadmap for legislation leading to that every use of the term big data has to be approved by the authorities beforehand.
A variety of ways to declare that your use of the term big data has been approved will be put into force for the different languages used within the Union. So far France has announced that “big data appellation d’originalité contrôlée” will be used there.
Velocity is the word that best describes the planned process for clamping down on the misuse of the term big data. As soon as in 2020 every member state must have started the legislation process and not later than 2025 the rules must be implemented in national laws. However there is a great deal of skepticism over if things could move that fast.
As I like to be on the top of the hype curve I was preparing a post about how Santa digs into big data, including social data streams, to be better at finding out who is nice and who is naughty and what they really want for Christmas. But then I suddenly had a light bulb moment saying: Wait, why don’t you take your own medicine and look up who that Santa guy really is?
Starting in social media checking twitter accounts was shocking. All profiles are fake. FaceBook, Linkedin and other social networks all turned out having no real Santa Claus. Going to commercial third party directories and open government data had the same result. No real Santa Claus there. Some address directories had a postal code with a relation like the postcode “H0 H0 H0” in Canada and “SAN TA1” in the UK, but they seem to kind of fake too.
So, shifting from relying on the purpose of use to real world alignment I have concluded that Santa Claus doesn’t exist and therefore he can’t have a data store looking like a toy elephant or any other big data operations going on.
Also I won’t, based on the above instant data quality mash up, register Santa Claus (Inc.) as a prospective customer in my CRM system. Sorry.
The below saying has become a popular share around in social media:
“Big data is like teenage sex. Everybody talks about it, nobody really knows how to do it, everyone thinks everyone else is doing it, so everyone claims they are doing it.”
Indeed, there is quite a lot of hype around big data as for example told in The Big MDM Trend.
The teenage sex joke isn’t new at all. It has been used about a lot of new trends. I remember when the e-Business hype started, the joke was used here as well as you still can find some evidence about if googling the saying and getting this and that.
Today e-Business has matured and maybe a few brick and mortar bookstores have stopped laughing about the e-Business and teenage-sex joke now.
Also, maybe the joke says more about parents’ knowledge about teenage-sex.
Analyst firms have a lot of fun in making different surveys and rankings of vendors in different markets using their own special visualizing method. For the Master Data Management (MDM) market we have this year had the:
Lazy as I am I haven’t made my own survey but simply taken the brand names from the rankings mentioned above and filled in the name either 1, 2 or 3 times from each report depending on how well the brand was positioned.
So the size of the letters tells something about market positioning according to analyst reports. The size of the words also tells something about the length of the brand name. The placement is according to the wordle principle of course totally random.
And of course I now expect a load of tweets from vendor marketing departments saying that their company is positioned very randomly in the MDM Market Wordle 🙂
I’m sorry if this blog is turning into a travel blog. But here’s a third Paris story.
Boulevard Haussmann is one of the city’s great thoroughfares (to use the right meta-data term) and is known to be where we can find the headquarters of SPECTRE.
While visiting SPECTRE today I learned a lot about how SPECTRE is exploiting big data as an important way of keeping up with the tough competition in its industry sector today. But all that is of course a secret.
When asking about if they still has trouble with Bond the answer was:
“Bond? – Jimmy Bond? – The sexy data scientist who is working for NSA?”
“Oh no, I replied. James Bond.”
“Oh, yes” the SPECTRE chief data manipulator replied. “He was with British Intelligence. But he has been moved to the EU Data Protection Service. He just got his license to fine. Now 2% and soon 5% of our global turnover each time. Very dangerous man. Very dangerous”.
The mentioned issue is about the use of quotes in social data: A famous person apparently said something apparently clever and the one who makes an update with the quote gets an unusual large amount of likes, retweets, +1s and other forms of recognition.
But many quotes weren’t actually said by that famous person. Maybe it was said by someone else and in many cases there is no evidence that the famous person said it. Some quotes, like the Einstein quote in the Crap post, actually contradicts what they apparently also has said.
As I have worked a lot with data entry functionality checking for data quality around if a certain address actually exist, if a typed in phone number is valid or an eMail address will bounce I think it’s time to make a quote checker to be plugged in on LinkedIn, Twitter, Facebook, Google Plus and other social networks.
So anyone else out there who wants to join the project – or has it already been said by someone else?